What ended up being two weeks with Herman Melville has become a blur to me, even though I’m writing this only a week after. We had a routine of waking up anywhere from one to three in the afternoon, getting breakfast, usually at some place “just around the corner,” a phrase Herman Melville used to describe any restaurant, bodega, or market within five-to-six blocks. He called me pet names. I have never gotten used to pet names. “My sweet,” “my little corgi,” and “my Philip Seymour Hoffman.” — Hannah Van Arsdale

Read more.

What ended up being two weeks with Herman Melville has become a blur to me, even though I’m writing this only a week after. We had a routine of waking up anywhere from one to three in the afternoon, getting breakfast, usually at some place “just around the corner,” a phrase Herman Melville used to describe any restaurant, bodega, or market within five-to-six blocks. He called me pet names. I have never gotten used to pet names. “My sweet,” “my little corgi,” and “my Philip Seymour Hoffman.” — Hannah Van Arsdale

Read more.

altlitgossip

Stephen Michael McDowell livetweets church

altlitgossip:

image

selected tweets from: ”back by popular demand’, me aggressively livetweeting a church service ‪#‎churchlivetweet‬’

im standing outside avoiding ppl

walked anxiously past a large gaggle of women aggressively smiling, hugging ppl, painfully attempted smiling back

1 of the women turned suddenly & angrily demanded a child ~10% her age hand her her bible

brought in a cup of coffee as what now seems like a sort of defense against being touched

choir singing a song that just goes ‘hallelujah ur worthy to be praised’ on what seems like an nvrending loop

minister in suit walked up to me & aggressively shook my hand, said ‘how are u stephen’, stared me in the eyes a long time

im as far back as i cld possibly be & still be considered ‘participating’

1 of the ppl in the choir is extremely close to a microphone & incapable of harmonizing, it seems

cant believe ive nvr had sex in this building

this service is coinciding w a multiple day ‘womens conference’, i think, feel terrified what the sermon will be abt

a prsn named vanessa williams who isnt vanessa williams is singing a song that has the words ‘joy comes w the son’ in it

theres a large wasp in this room

told my dad theres a wasp, he kissed me on the cheek & said ‘ok, u can protect everyone’ lol

feels like the ‘joy comes w the son’ song has been going on for years

i dont think my phone batterys going to survive this livetweet

ppl keep making sex-noise-like ‘mm’ sounds & saying ‘thank u’ at bizarre-seeming intervals

my godmother is preaching

the pastor said something that seemed vaguely gender-bend-y then tried to undo it awkwardly

oh wait godmom is just introducing my cousin whos actually the 1 preaching

havent seen my cousin in ~4yrs, now feel terrified ill have to hang out w her after this

cousin shouted out every pastor at the church including my dad before beginning to preach, seemed insane

doesnt seem like shes started preaching shes just talking to the audience repeating ‘women who win & men who are mighty’

kicking into ‘idgaf anymore mode’

might start watching star trek on netflix, no one wld even notice

preacher telling an anecdote abt an australian preacher w no arms who rolls around on stage while preaching

trying to figure out the wifi password

if i figure out the wifi pw im literally turning this into a star trek livetweet

p sure i just found out my cousin ( preachers son ) died via anecdote in this sermon

jesus, yea my cousin died, v fucked up way to find out imo

wifi password situation seems bleak

at this point preacher is just talking abt having cancer, this is getting way too real

this is a live action horror movie

i dont understand how turning these anecdotes into bible rhetoric / convos w jesus changes anything

preacher said the word ‘saved’ & a lot of ppl whooped & hollered, idgi

preacher says rly fucked up things followed by something like ‘but my help cometh from the lord’ loudly & ppl say ‘yasss’

preacher says the way she recovered from heart failure was by ‘walking by faith not by sight’, wtf does that mean ?

preachers doing an armor metaphor, said ‘the helmet of faith’

realizing bc of low mic the ppl in this part of the church are being uncharacteristically quiet, feel grateful

bro sitting in front of me keeps looking back at me w a face like ‘is she forreal ?’ & ‘wtf is she talkin abt ?’

this is 1 of the most fucked up days of my life

not sure what shes talking abt anymore but preacher said ‘heroin’ & ‘crack’ which got my attn

have i srsly been here doing this for an hour & a half ? kill me

lms if i shld just leave rn

preacher finally started preaching, said ‘1) uve got to break the chains of choice’, have no idea what shes talking abt

preacher started telling the story of esther, seemingly unrelated to anything else

preacher keeps saying ‘im a diamond’

wasp got caught in a spiderweb, sources reveal

preachers rushing thru ‘alter call prayer’ bc took too long talking abt seemingly nothing, however enthusiastically

my goddad ( the senior pastor ) cut out early, passed me, stopped, congrat’d me on getting a new job while preacher prayed

ok, shows over, bcup out

cousin/preacher didnt recognize me when passing me thank god

for more livetweets by me follow http://twitter.com/smmlivetweet

_

Stephen Michael McDowell

arbitrarynewsandreview

pls dont ever apologize to me for anything ever again for the rest of ur life by Elizabeth Foster and Stephen Michael McDowell

arbitrarynewsandreview:

image

Elizabeth Foster and Stephen Michael McDowell are two Arbitrary News and Review all-stars. These are people with voices, people not to be ignored. The fact that they made an ebook on New Hive together is one of the truest delights of Summer 2014. 

Each piece is titled after a different astronomical sequence, which I think has something to do with galaxies or solar systems, I’m not sure, I didn’t do very well in astronomy. Mentions of the universe and space are common in this ebook, and each reference is stunningly sincere and vast, but a unique kind of vastness. It’s a vastness that does not forget the intimate smallness of individual life, a vastness that exists only because of tiny little moments which feel overwhelmingly powerful.

Such as: 

"the universe wont ever forget our 1st kiss
even when & if our finities do will themselves to”

Something else I got out of this ebook is the idea that everything is united on an atomic level. I could possibly be projecting, because it’s something I believe in, but there is an overarching theme, one that threads together the elements that form all matter. But this theme is approached uniquely, because there always remains an acknowledgment of the self as a distinct entity. Everything is one, everything is not one. It’s a paradox, and I like it.

This ebook could not exist without the internet. I mean, like, literally, ebooks exist online, but also, like, things like the act of deleting emails and visiting Wikipedia are integral to this text. Also Snapchat. And wifi. And there’s heavy usage of “u” and “ur” and even “ngl” once or twice. I like all of this. It’s modern, and an ebook lends itself to modernity. It’s good to know that a book like this could only exist right now, and at no other time in history. It makes it special.

Read this ebook after a quick trip to the planetarium. You went to the planetarium because you wanted to have an extreme experience, and when you got there and saw the crowds, you were initially disheartened, but then you went in the seats and felt like James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause and saw all the fake stars and then everything was ok.

You can read it here.

beachsloth
beachsloth:

I spent two weeks with a famous person and all I got was severe depression and a penchant for cocaine by Hannah Van Arsdale
                Ah yes any trip to meet a special someone is going to be odd. The levels between the two are impossible to even out. By traveling a great distance from coast to coast to meet an online someone there is going to be moments of pure weird. Online a person can edit their interaction think twice about what they are going to do. With the offline lifestyle an individual cannot hide behind a computer screen. Souls are impossible to hide offline. Habits, the messy ones, the ones that have a person wear the exact same outfit every day, those are tough to break. 
                Guests are supposed to feel welcome. It is perfectly normal. A host needs to cater to their needs. Doing so is relatively difficult however. Oftentimes guests develop strange habits. For a guest a new exciting habit might be enjoying delicious lemonade, having a heaping bowl of Special K, and developing a penchant for cocaine. Thanks to the mass commoditization movement all of these requests can be catered to and more. Economically sound the world’s economy relies upon this kind of spending, the kind where it begs people to please consume for the sake of everyone. Unfortunately such spending has to reduce expenses elsewhere hence the need for roommates. 
                Sex happens. Life is sex. When a person was created that happened because of sex or less likely, some form of decanting via the Brave New World. Typically people have sex as a way to pass the time because there is so much time and it is so easy to waste it. People aren’t born with much but usually they are born with literally years ahead of them ready to simply grow older. Hence people have sex to go to sleep because sex is awesome and sex is a way to make sure there’s at least some form of exercise during the day. Sex is the ultimate sleeping aid. 
                Fuzzy details are details that have grown chest hair. Aging does that to the details growing out hair until the original intention is unclear. That is fine. Nobody really needs to remember everything and the mind does a great job of blocking out needless information. When an argument happens that is usually a great time to basically tune out. Due to the mind’s penchant for remembering the bad time (to compare them against the good) arguments linger longer than they should. Then the trip is over and the return to home happens once again, with a brief view of a person’s life left in the mind.

beachsloth:

I spent two weeks with a famous person and all I got was severe depression and a penchant for cocaine by Hannah Van Arsdale

                Ah yes any trip to meet a special someone is going to be odd. The levels between the two are impossible to even out. By traveling a great distance from coast to coast to meet an online someone there is going to be moments of pure weird. Online a person can edit their interaction think twice about what they are going to do. With the offline lifestyle an individual cannot hide behind a computer screen. Souls are impossible to hide offline. Habits, the messy ones, the ones that have a person wear the exact same outfit every day, those are tough to break. 

                Guests are supposed to feel welcome. It is perfectly normal. A host needs to cater to their needs. Doing so is relatively difficult however. Oftentimes guests develop strange habits. For a guest a new exciting habit might be enjoying delicious lemonade, having a heaping bowl of Special K, and developing a penchant for cocaine. Thanks to the mass commoditization movement all of these requests can be catered to and more. Economically sound the world’s economy relies upon this kind of spending, the kind where it begs people to please consume for the sake of everyone. Unfortunately such spending has to reduce expenses elsewhere hence the need for roommates. 

                Sex happens. Life is sex. When a person was created that happened because of sex or less likely, some form of decanting via the Brave New World. Typically people have sex as a way to pass the time because there is so much time and it is so easy to waste it. People aren’t born with much but usually they are born with literally years ahead of them ready to simply grow older. Hence people have sex to go to sleep because sex is awesome and sex is a way to make sure there’s at least some form of exercise during the day. Sex is the ultimate sleeping aid. 

                Fuzzy details are details that have grown chest hair. Aging does that to the details growing out hair until the original intention is unclear. That is fine. Nobody really needs to remember everything and the mind does a great job of blocking out needless information. When an argument happens that is usually a great time to basically tune out. Due to the mind’s penchant for remembering the bad time (to compare them against the good) arguments linger longer than they should. Then the trip is over and the return to home happens once again, with a brief view of a person’s life left in the mind.

moontempleuniverse
electric-cereal:

Ghosts by Moon Temple
It’s a bad idea to become close to a writer because it hurts to know the truth about yourself. Your heart will be pierced. It becomes suffocating. At the age of eight, in the summer-time, I would swim at a swimming pool with the day-camp group my grandma paid for me to be a part of. Paid for me to get out of the house, interact with others my own age, gain useful life-lessons from the high school-aged counselors managing the camp. In the pool, the older boys would often swim up behind me, putting one hand on my head and the other around my shoulders, and dunk me. Every time felt like death. So sudden. I’d be gasping for air for a full minute after. The way other people speak about you when they don’t realize you are listening. The way other people see you. The words feel suffocating.
read story here

electric-cereal:

Ghosts by Moon Temple

It’s a bad idea to become close to a writer because it hurts to know the truth about yourself. Your heart will be pierced. It becomes suffocating. At the age of eight, in the summer-time, I would swim at a swimming pool with the day-camp group my grandma paid for me to be a part of. Paid for me to get out of the house, interact with others my own age, gain useful life-lessons from the high school-aged counselors managing the camp. In the pool, the older boys would often swim up behind me, putting one hand on my head and the other around my shoulders, and dunk me. Every time felt like death. So sudden. I’d be gasping for air for a full minute after. The way other people speak about you when they don’t realize you are listening. The way other people see you. The words feel suffocating.

read story here

beachsloth
beachsloth:

Oddity by Stephen Michael McDowell
                Initially the world comes out looking pretty badly for a while. That is the impression a child gets when they get out of childhood. Parents do an excellent job getting the filters right. Objects are colorful, buildings tall, and there is a small infinitely unaware of the world around them. Upon realization of the world there is the backlash. Everything turns ugly, coyote-ugly. For a while it hurts knowing that the beautiful world of childhood was a lie. A few people experience the world like this for literal years as they see civilization extended this way backwards and forwards in time. Negative thoughts begin to cloud judgment as the sun stays in and the sky turns gray. 
                The world does not have to be a terrible place. Yes there are awful things in the world plenty of which will never be resolved. Life is mostly unresolved. Unlike fiction where an individual knows the cutoff point and the character cast is limited there is infinite possibilities. By viewing the world in a negative light these possibilities take on darker tones. Indeed this is true. At any moment a great deal of horrible things can happen to anyone. What is remarkable about life is how rarely this happens. People remember the tragedies yet even amongst the most tragedy-filled individuals most of their lives are not tragic things. They are tender things that generally are at the very least okay. 
                Realizing the world is not a cold dark place takes time. Not everybody gets there. Positivity is an incredibly hard outlook to have when the news bombards individuals with horrible stories. This news need not be broadcast from a device. It could be something as simple as overhearing a conversation about somebody else. Such overheard sadness can dig into the soul and hurt. Life is full of hurt and the purpose of all the suffering is to appreciate when things go well. That is called hope and it has led to many people finding a salvation of sorts. 
                Life is never resolved. It is un-ending until it randomly is done with the person and the person is tossed aside to become a corpse or whatever dead people do. Perhaps the frustrating thing about life is the uncertainty. Yet when the uncertainty is seen as a positive thing as unlimited potential it can light up a life. Enlightenment happens only after very many years and some only see the light after they are dead. 

beachsloth:

Oddity by Stephen Michael McDowell

                Initially the world comes out looking pretty badly for a while. That is the impression a child gets when they get out of childhood. Parents do an excellent job getting the filters right. Objects are colorful, buildings tall, and there is a small infinitely unaware of the world around them. Upon realization of the world there is the backlash. Everything turns ugly, coyote-ugly. For a while it hurts knowing that the beautiful world of childhood was a lie. A few people experience the world like this for literal years as they see civilization extended this way backwards and forwards in time. Negative thoughts begin to cloud judgment as the sun stays in and the sky turns gray. 

                The world does not have to be a terrible place. Yes there are awful things in the world plenty of which will never be resolved. Life is mostly unresolved. Unlike fiction where an individual knows the cutoff point and the character cast is limited there is infinite possibilities. By viewing the world in a negative light these possibilities take on darker tones. Indeed this is true. At any moment a great deal of horrible things can happen to anyone. What is remarkable about life is how rarely this happens. People remember the tragedies yet even amongst the most tragedy-filled individuals most of their lives are not tragic things. They are tender things that generally are at the very least okay. 

                Realizing the world is not a cold dark place takes time. Not everybody gets there. Positivity is an incredibly hard outlook to have when the news bombards individuals with horrible stories. This news need not be broadcast from a device. It could be something as simple as overhearing a conversation about somebody else. Such overheard sadness can dig into the soul and hurt. Life is full of hurt and the purpose of all the suffering is to appreciate when things go well. That is called hope and it has led to many people finding a salvation of sorts. 

                Life is never resolved. It is un-ending until it randomly is done with the person and the person is tossed aside to become a corpse or whatever dead people do. Perhaps the frustrating thing about life is the uncertainty. Yet when the uncertainty is seen as a positive thing as unlimited potential it can light up a life. Enlightenment happens only after very many years and some only see the light after they are dead.